Eyunta.com

Being back in San Diego brings back many memories of my youth: sitting at the beach for lunch, cool dry breeze, and of course Mexican food. When most people think about Mexican food they thin tacos and burritos and fresh guacamole. In San Diego there are literally one thousand Mexican places to stop in and get any number of unique to the area taste sensations that make living here all the more better. Then of course, you have Del Taco…

Del Taco ( means “Of the taco”) is a fast food Mexican restaurant in the model of taco Bell. It serves Americanized Tex-Mex crap that is usually inundated with nacho cheese and questionable meats. The only difference between T-Bell and Del T is that Del has crinkle cut french fries just like they had in your high school cafeteria! The food is moderately cheap and appealing in theory but pretty much awful in practice.

So based on some sort of nostalgia that told me I wanted this crap I stopped in late one night and picked up a assortment of salt laden snack foods disguised as ethnic cuisine. The sac-O-crap cost about 11 dollars and weighed a good 3 pounds. After a week of eating oatmeal, PBJ, baby carrots, and tofu I felt a strange compulsion to imbibe on the most vile concotion known to man: fast food ground beef.

Frist up was the Deluxe Chili Cheese Fries. As you can see its a shitstorm of neon cheese flavoured oil sauce on top of brown much with dottings of “fresh veggies” The fries are awesome and would have been great without the goop. You can slog through these eats and by the time you are done you are stuffed. Unfortunately if you are me you had a full sac-O-crap awaiting you so i had to push on. But before I move on, check out these nutritional facts:
-Cal. 710
-fat 49
-Chol. 50
-Sod. 880

Next up was the big fat chicken taco. Its pretty much a pita stuffed with lettuce and a weird mayonnaise sauce filled with giblets of the spongiest chicken I have ever had! Im not sure what this has in common with a Mexican dish but it easily could have been greek. Its a tasty choice but it costs nearly 3 dollars so it doesnt come cheap. It also doesnt come healthy even though it was literally covered in a head of iceberg lettuce!
-Cal. 340
-fat 13
-Chol. 45
-Sod. 840

Finally there was the Macho Combo Beef Burrito. At this point I was overflowing with sludge and nearing complete nauseau. I understand why so many stoners eat fast food because I was ready to break out th ebong after this ailmentary assualt. Still I pushed on and unraveled the hefty 2 pound behomth that contained more processed food products than a Kraft factory! Inside was a disturbing amount of glistening “meat products” with sploches of wilted lettuce and sour cream curds. Thats it. Literally 2 pounds of shit meat. I couldnt believe I was eating as I took my first bite and discovered a granular texture like crunching sand between my teeth. I got through 2/3rds before I gave up and heaved the remnants of this decayed cow into the garbage bag. No fucking way, that shit was horrid…
-Cal. 1170
-fat 62
-Chol. 195
-Sod. 2190

So that burrito had a whole entires day worth of salt and cholesterol and nearly half of your caloric intake. If you combine the amount of food eaten and look at the nutrition it means I have eaten just about 2250 calories, 124 total fat, 290 cholesterol, and a whopping 3910 sodium mgs! Eating this meal most likely shaved a year off of my life and exposed me to enough carcinogens to qualify me as a potential health hazard. The next morning was a morning of reckoning. Im not going to get into details, but I will say that I will never eat Del Taco again. And neither should you…